We're most scared of what we can't see...

A few days ago I had the real pleasure of talking to the wonderful "Heart Doctor" Cathy Matarazzo and her co-host, intrinsic coach, Warren Wojnowski on their brand new radio show Let's Get Real Radio.

We talked about big versus small change, leaps of faith compared to baby steps and everything in between. We also talked about that old biggie - Fear - and how it can keep us stuck.

Cathy asked me if I still had fears of my own to confront. Well, no sooner had the show finished then I found myself facing a real-life fear up close and personal. Alone in the house at 8pm there was a power cut. The house was plunged into darkness (it gets real dark in the country).

Heart pounding, my immediate thought - silly as this now seems - was that someone was trying to break into the house and had cut the electricity. My response? I froze. Standing on the landing in complete darkness I knew I had to go downstairs and find the flashlight but what kept me stuck was not being able to see. I imagined all kinds of worst case scenarios - mostly involving men in balaclavas jumping out at me. How long did it take to convince myself to move? Maybe about five minutes, but they were five very long, gut-wrenching minutes.

In the comfort of bright daylight here in the relative safety of my office I realise that what that little experience teaches me is that fear is at its strongest when we can't see. When we can't see where to put our feet, where the handholds are, what obstacles we might bump into, whether there's a sheer drop we're just inches from stepping into - we freeze. We stay there in the darkness, feeling better off if only because we're not moving forward.

In real life, not knowing what's on the other side of a major life change or decision is enough to root us to the spot.

Talking to Cathy I was minded to recall the quote that got me moving when I felt the most stuck in my life. It's by Anaïs Nin.

And the time came when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom

I quote this often for a reason. There comes a point where staying where we are - unhappy, unfulfilled, unappreciated - is more frightening than taking those first steps to a new life, to change, to taking control of our own happiness.

You can hear the whole interview with Cathy here

(Check out Cathy's fantastic laugh. If that isn't enough to put a smile on your face I don't know what is!)

Oh, and by the way, there weren't any men in balaclavas. It wasn't a break in. It was just a power cut. And I did make it down from the landing - eventually.

Best wishes,

Dawn