The Naked Face

What it means to be truly authentic

About a year ago, I was in an audience to hear BBC Radio 2 presenter Chris Evans talk about the ups and downs of his career. One of the most talented presenters of his generation, Chris became famous for his outrageous style and for breaking boundaries. In the chat, he recalled a conversation he'd had with a senior producer on his very first day on the job. After the show, the producer took him to one side and said, "That was great Chris, but was that the real you?". Chris was puzzled. "Of course that was the real me." "OK," the producer said, "But if it wasn't, make your money and get out of presenting fast, before the audience realises".

What the producer was trying to say was: Be yourself, don't try to be something you're not. Because in the world of TV and radio, once the audience sniffs out you're a fake you're finished.

We seem to be hardwired to spot a phony, don't we? It may not even be something we're conscious of, but if someone is putting on an act just to please us, we can somehow sense it and we don't like it. Someone who is not who they say they are instantly loses all credibility and respect. The minute we spot a fake, we're baying for blood.

So what is being authentic, being an authentic person? I would say it's condensing all your actions, behaviours, words until they truly represent who you really are? It takes practise. It requires a degree of self-examination. It means asking yourself, "Am I saying what I really think in this situation?" or, "Am I being brave enough to be me or am I just conforming to what I think this situation or these people require of me".

I find that especially true in the business environment. We tend to put on a different face when we're working in a corporate environment to the one we'd wear at home. Of course, the world of business dicates we all behave in a certain way, there's an unwritten code of conduct, for good or bad. But, that doesn't mean we all need to lose ourselves and become yes men or women.

Think of all the great truly individual people you know of. Think of the businessmen and women who seem to have broken the mould, the people you respect the most, think of those great networkers. What makes them different?

A friend described great networkers as 'people who are themselves no matter who they speak to'. I think that's about right. But it's more than that. They are people who either, consciously or unconsciously, realise that our differences are our strengths. Meeting someone who is being "truly themself " is refreshing. It's also inspiring.

And, not to mention, smart. Think about all the energy you expend, switching your mask or playing a different role to suit every different occasion. If you're constantly switching between roles, well, frankly, isn't that a little exhausting? If you're just one person - you - 100% of the time, well, that's simple isn't it?

So, on the road to becoming truly authentic, here are a few thoughts:

* In any situation where you are required to be present, to contribute - be it at work or at home ask - Am I being truly authentic? Am I standing by what I believe in, what I feel or know to be true?

* What do I stand to lose or gain by not being who I really am?

* What do I stand to lose or gain by being who I truly am?

* Forget for a moment your perception of how you "should" be. I hear clients say things like "Well, to be any good in business I should be hard-nosed" or "I should be networking 24-7". Reinvent what it means to be good in business - go with what feels right for you. The minute you step outside being authentic, you'll feel it. It will feel uncomfortable.

* What roles do I regularly play? Mr Dependable? Yummy Mummy? Domestic Goddess? Put-upon employee? How does that serve me? Does it serve me well? Is that who I really am or is it something I feel I am trying to live up to?

* What would it feel like to ditch that role and just be simply myself?

Have a great week,


Dawn